Missin Randomness ...

hmm... (i hv never understood y most of my posts strt wid a hmm..) anyways...tht shudnt b a concern... almost 10 mnths after irma...in my 2nd job...stayng in a two room small apartment wid a frend...getn up at 6:20 daily... hve to leave home at 7:20 sharp..(if its 7:21, it means m late fr d cab).. reach office at 8:10.. thr till 5:30.. reach home at 6:20... doin nothin gr8..."So wAT !!!" (d Big Question Which Prof AG n Prof DPM emphasized durin d MAC classes)... evryone does d same.. evryone has to wrk... Wats new in dis... nothing... thts wat d point m trying to mke here.. thts nothing new in wat m doing...d only difference in my previous job n dis one is... atleast i hve a hope of gettin sumthng better - a better project - some challenges + i dnt hve d guilt of wasting an entire day over 2 cups of coffee !!

Wat is it which would give me tht inner momentum... tht zeal...i dnt know.. or may b i kne... i kne it has to do wid sumthng where results can b seen.. sum wrk which actually makes atleast one face smile...atleast one life better...leaves atleast one mind wid questions to think over... is it sumthng too much m askin fr... but hvng said all tht.. it doesnt mean tht i want a life full of troubles n challenges... i want a Happy life... but here, d point to b stressed upon is d way u define Happiness...

i miss d randomness in my life... i hate dis fixed routine...dis scheduled living... where d thoughts abt house rent, electricity bill, grocery, education loan, future plannin r more prominent than a simple happy life... if m writin this.. d reason behind all this routine is also me... noone else is responsible... its d fear within me which is leading me to this... d fear of uncertainity.. d fear of randomness...

d irony is "m afraid of wat m missin d most in my life... Randomness".....